The topic of sleep training can be a divisive topic that often people avoid, it’s right up there with vaccinations and circumcision.   When I read posts and comments on online that are judging people that have sleep trained, or nit-picking about which way is best, or saying that chronic sleep-deprivation is just part of parenting children, my blood boils.

Let’s call it sleep “learning” shall we?

First and foremost, I really dislike the term “sleep training”, I know it has a very negative connotation, but I also don’t believe that we “train” children. 

Do we “train” children to eat or walk, or ride a bike? 

No! 

We love them and support them as they learn new skills, and there are many ways to do that, ways that can feel loving and forge connection with our children. 

I have never been a fan of crying it out and I don’t recommend parents use cry it out as they help their babies sleep.  I am NOT judging those that do, but… it’s just not my thing.

But seriously, I have the best job… 

So, why do I believe that helping parents support their babies, while they learn to sleep, is the absolute best job in the world? 

Because I know what it is like to have a child that doesn’t sleep. 

I know how it feels to have my mental and physical health decline with each sleepless night. 

I know how anxiety and depression can start to creep in, while joy and well-being start to fade. 

Exhaustion is one of the top causes of postpartum depression- did you know that?  

I have been where you are

I’ve been the anxious mom who doesn’t leave the house because my child is so tired and cranky that I can’t have a conversation over his fussing, let alone think straight and carry on a conversation due to my own exhaustion. 

I have been the parent that felt her heart break when she realized that she had come to resent her own baby because he wouldn’t sleep. 

I was the mom that experienced constant anxiety and stood at the door, anxiously waiting until her husband returned from work so she could get a minute of rest. 

And I was the mom that felt panicked if he was even 5 minutes late, because I couldn’t stand another minute.

You’re not alone

If you can relate to any of these feelings, please know that you are not alone. 

I get it.

I’ve been there. 

I promise that you don’t have to feel this way, and I am here to help.  If you are desperate, and people are telling you “that is just the way it goes and you just have to suck it up”, then don’t believe it. 

Parenting doesn’t have to be this hard…

You don’t have to leave your baby to cry alone in his crib.

 There is a reason my plans include weeks and up to a month+ of support, because sometimes parents need to take things very slow, and sometimes babies need gradual change, and I can help you with a plan that suits you and your parenting style. 

 I truly believe that judging exhausted mother’s for wanting to get their babies to sleep is dangerous. 

Please, if you need help, if you feel anxious, depressed or so tired that you shouldn’t operate machinery, reach out for help. 

And if you are someone that is judging others for reaching out for help, please don’t.  You do what is best for you and let others do the same, because we truly are all in this together.